Unguarded Moments

As a principal I get the opportunity to work with parents and students in a way I could not as a classroom teacher. This comes in a variety of forms but generally these exchanges come when their child is in trouble and some problem solving must be done. The downside to this for me is that I usually reflect on my own parenting once the day has ended. I question what I think about my own kids and how my wife and I should be raising them.

I have a student who is great. She is trustworthy and hard working and is it very evident her parents did a wonderful job raising her. She recently got into some minor trouble (from the school's standpoint) that turned into big trouble when her parents found out she had been keeping a secret from them. This was no doubt uncomfortable for me to sit in the middle of but the whole time I could only think about my own daughter if she were in this situation.

With all the encounters I have had with parents I have learned one thing, it is impossible to cover it all. We can instill in them all the best values and spend time and money getting them involved in countless activities that will keep them out of trouble but in the end, we can't cover it all. Our precious little ones will have a multitude of unguarded moments in their day and who knows how many in there school years. We can't be there for all of them to give them good advice we can only hope the core values we have taught them will kick in.

I am always amused about the parents that ask me to monitor all their child's social interactions because they are having a hard time at school. I appreciate their efforts to get the school involved but I, just as them, cannot be there for every unguarded moment. I often wonder if they really want my help or they want me to cope with their child's problems for them. Maybe this is what they have done for their children but it is unfair to ask the school to do this.

I think what I'm getting at is that I want to be a reasonable parent and my job has allowed me to see case studies in parenting. I learn lessons everyday that show me what to do and what not to do. I still have a very high opinion of the student mentioned above. She was just coping with her situation in the best way she knew how and I will be sure to apply what I have learned to my own children.