Thankful for Bad Days

I was listening to a podcast by Dr. Scott England about double standards.  In his opening he talked about having bad days.  After I finished listening, I began to reflect on some of my bad days.  I can't lie, sometimes I get loud with students.  This is usually after several efforts to correct a situation that has failed either because the student didn't follow the coaching or because I had to go into dad mode and shut it all down.  I'm never happy with myself after getting loud with a student.  I do not go into each day inviting that situation, but it does happen every once in a while.  I have bad days like everyone else.

The strange reality is that I have come to the conclusion that I am thankful for bad days.  I spend a lot of time on kids that I know need me.  That investment can yield a lot of happiness or a lot of frustration.  When a bad day happens and I no longer am willing to tolerate poor choices, I get loud.  When I get loud, I am quite remorseful.  Sometimes I even instinctively flinch because I'm waiting on my mom to smack me on the back of the head because I know better.  So why am I thankful for bad days?

I have learned over the years to understand that my bad days happen because I care about what happens to my students.  I care about their success.  I care about where they will end up.  I care about how others perceive them.  If you have ever seen a passionate coach yell at a player or at an official in protection of a player, that is basically what we are talking about.  I'm not talking about the crazy coaches that can't keep a job.  I'm talking about the ones that knowingly practice a 10:1 rule, meaning 10 positive comments to one negative.  They know the relationship is paramount and it has to be protected even when you slip up.

Dr. England's message was certainly not lost on me.  If I expect them to handle conflicts with class and a level head, then I should too.  I saw a great meme being passed around on Twitter last week.  The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice.  I cannot imagine anyone that could disagree with that statement.  I am 42 years old and I can still hear the stern voices of my mentors in most things that I do.  While I am thankful for the zeal that I show my students, I hope they get more from me than the experience of a bad day.  Be mindful of your double standards folks, but rejoice in your passion for students.  The kids have a way of seeing both of those.

Reflecting on Columbine

Twenty years ago today, an American tragedy took place.  Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris shot and killed 13 people and wounded 20 others.  This was part of a failed plan to use bombs to kill hundreds more.  This horrific event sparked not only a national debate on gun control and video games, but changed how school buildings operate and even how they are designed.  There is not a year that has gone by in my entire 17 year education career that I have not completed some safety training or improved a safety plan.  It is part of our education culture now for both educators and students.

I have to tell you that the worst thing I have heard an adult say over the years is, "He's our next school shooter" when they are worried about how a troubled student is acting.  Psychologists warn that there really isn't a strict profile, but rather factors for consideration.  These include:

• The theme for school shootings is revenge and anger.
• 75% of shooters felt harassed or bullied by their classmates.
• Shooters may have a history of cruelty to animals (this is a low probability factor, but a significant one when present)
• Shooters tend to have experienced dysfunctional family situations or experience a lack of effective adult supervision, mentoring, or oversight.

You can't profile a shooter, but educators are trained to spot warning signs.  I will be honest, this was not in my teacher education program.  

The law enforcement approach has changed also.  I attended a training several years ago where a video was shown of an active shooter simulation and how officers are trained to respond.  Body cameras were used for a realistic effect.  This was gut wrenching.  They are trained to rush in and engage the shooter to eliminate the threat.  In the video, officers were seen running past students that were injured and crying for help in an effort to reach the shooter.  I had to remind myself that these heroes run towards trouble to protect us while others run away.  I have reminded my staff of this when we have our active shooter drills and discussions.

There has been much debate over the years of how to prevent and/or respond to school shootings.  Is it a gun control issue?  Is it a the failure of the American family?  Are violent video games to blame?  These and other theories might be beyond your influence so I ask you, How are you rushing in?  I'm not saying rush in to a school shooting.  I'm saying rush in to being whatever influence you think is needed.  If you ask me, rush into being a teacher.  Rush into being a counselor.  Rush into the ministry.  Rush into something that allows you to make a real impact on a child that needs real human connection.  It is easy to sit in the cheap seats and say you think a kid is going to go off.  It's more worth it to save a troubled life before law enforcement has to be rushed in to save hundreds.  Please engage others in this conversation.  Not to place blame, but to focus on solutions.  Our kids deserve that.

On a side note, the Southern Illinoisan ran a great piece on how these shootings have affected the survivors and communities of Columbine and Parkland.  Please be reminded that these incidents have a greater impact than just the reported dead and injured.  You can click here to read it.

The Happiness of Losing a Teacher

I got a phone call about a teacher.  Not a complaint.  It was quite the opposite.  It was a reference check.  Dare I say it wasn't just any reference check.  This teacher is an aspiring administrator and was in the final stages of being employed as an assistant principal in a district nearby.  While I am bummed about losing a good teacher, I am excited for her to take on this opportunity.  She did some of her intern work with me and she is ready to lead.  Congratulations Marion Junior High.  You are getting a good one.

She is the third teacher I have lost to administration in eight years here.  Personally, I love it.  I get to check in with my other two occasionally and they have made me proud.  I have had co-workers and community members from both districts tell me that they love their principals and I'm sure this third teacher turned admin will also yield the same feedback.  I will not take any credit for how well they do but I do feel we have an obligation to help grow those who want to become building leaders.  By the way, another congratulations to Arcola Elementary School on getting a good one too.

I heard a colleague say about the teacher shortage that his current teachers used to be the best recruiters for new teachers.  They provided the narrative of how great teaching is and passed it on to others.  That is very true, but it is also true for us administrators.  We don't have to push people into administrative work, but we can always model good leadership so that others can aspire to make the leap.  One of my other Type 75 teachers once told me very honestly that he could not be a principal because he saw what I put into the job and didn't think he could do it.  I've always told him that he could, but I see this as positive feedback. He sees my commitment and passion for the work.  If I am doing anything right, I am leading by example.  If that moves people into the principal's office, then it is worth it.

I really have three hopes for my teachers that jump into administration.

1. Making the move is family decision.  Don't overlook that.
2. Realize that you are a public servant.  That entails responsibility and accountability to people.
3. Be better at this than I am.  Like, way better.

We are not only facing a teacher shortage but we are also facing a principal shortage.  One of the recommendations to keep principals is to work to elevate the the perception of the profession as a call to service.  In my opinion, this effort is past due by state officials and must be carried out by us.  The effects of principal turnover are harmful to both students and teachers.  Achievement tends to drop and teachers tend to leave.  Just as it is our duty to encourage teachers to become principals, it is the job of these new leaders to commit to staying to inspire and lead others.

When I was teaching they called making the move to administration "going to the dark side".  It is only appropriate then that we use a Yoda quote to wrap this up.  In The Last Jedi he tells Luke that "we are what they grow beyond.  That is the burden of all masters."  In other words, it should be the natural order of things that they become better than us.  So to LeighAnn Bailey, Megan Price and now Sarah Stowers please move past me.  By a long way.  That is the only way I am happy to lose a teacher.