Failing Forward

 

This was the scene at a local library not too long ago.  I was asked to come and promote my new book, Nine Ways to Make Awesome Kids.  I had visited this library for a similar event for my first book.  It was well attended and generated some great conversation.  For this one, no one showed.

This is not the only failure I'm realizing with this project.  To date, it has only sold three copies on Amazon and zero copies on Barnes & Noble.  I have given away ten copies.  The Facebook page I created to stimulate conversation around the book was shuttered very quickly due to low participation, despite paying for boosts and ads.  I even created a wide variety of Reels to share on Instagram and Facebook.  My hopes of creating a podcast around the book also faded when I could not find a suitable co-host.  The gears just never got turning.

I might accept these failures, but I am not happy with them.  I had two offers to publish this book, but I declined them because I did not want to pay a share of the investment to get it off the ground.  Maybe I should have, but I wanted to keep full control of my work.  So why am I telling you this?

Writing a book is hard folks.  When you have something to say and start outlining a project, you go into a strange state of flow that you never experienced when being forced to write in high school or college.  You know, back when you desperately just tried to get to the word count for a paper.  This is different.  You might take an hour to write one sentence or spend an hour writing ten pages.  It's hard to explain the self doubt you may have over one single line but you will stare at it endlessly until it makes sense.  

There is really no money in this, unless you write for a living.  I do not, but I feel I have a set of experiences and a perspective that I think people might want to read about.  So when I see that the book is not selling, I am only discouraged that the message I'm sending is not being received.  You want the work you put in to be read and taken to task.  This is how ideas are exchanged and new ideas take hold.  I truly feel Nine Ways has a place in our current state of parenting and teaching.  Not everyone feels the same it seems.

I've already been asked if I plan on writing another book.  My response is that I am not even thinking about it.  To many, it seems like writing a book is like running a marathon.  Once it's done, it is done and then you stand back and say, "Look what I did."  This is not the case for authors.  You want the work to be read and to endure and when it's not, you can't help breaking it down and being critical of yourself.

Failure is part of this game and I will lick my wounds and go on.  The idea is to always fail forward towards something better and I will keep trying to do that.  The good news is that I have a day job to fall back on.

You can purchase Nine Ways at https://a.co/d/8MwyWaS

You can purchase Leaving Poverty at https://a.co/d/bfxuWb3

Rage Sells Thanks to Section 230

 I taught high school civics many moons ago and with out sounding too grandiose, it was one of the best parts of my professional life.  Kids come in with a notion of our freedoms that is inspiring, but you have to help them pump the brakes and learn the rules.  This is especially true with the freedom of speech.

Freedom of speech is back in the headlines after the high profile murder of Charlie Kirk.  With the Trump administration on high alert, they have taken aim at journalists and network news.  People on both sides are fired up and making every attempt to blame the other.  If I'm being honest, both sides share blame for the direction of political discourse in our country.  The cynic in me would like to point out that politicians are part of a larger brand (Democrat or Republican) and not service oriented as we elect them to be.  This is why we see them voting party lines, even at the local level.  They have to maintain the brand so they can keep base voters.  To keep base voters, they must rely on their coverage in the media and what kind of engagement they get online just as if they were selling a product.

This I where I want to jump in.  Our lives online have gotten out of control.  Professor Scott Galloway recently said that sex no longer sells. Rage is now how you get engagement with a brand.  A great micro example is the Sydney Sweeney controversy with her jeans ad.  The ads were not revealing by today's standards, but revealing that she is a Republican was troubling for many for some strange reason.  The play book is that if you can gin up enough outrage, people will follow you.  The problem with this is that we re hurting ourselves and each other because of it.

How many of you have heard of Section 230 of the Communications Act?  It may not be important to you, but it is wildly important to social media companies.  The law and subsequent court decisions holds that the social media company is not liable for content that is published by its users.  It only says they have to make good faith effort to moderate.  As we know, moderation is often left to the users and this is not a workable system for those who lack self control.

When I left Twitter, their in-app moderation tools were failing and I was continually getting hateful content that I was trying to eliminate from my feed.  I leave and move to Treads where I was inundated right away with content about how bad teachers are and why everyone should be homeschooled.  Rage does indeed sell.  The engagement on these posts was astonishing.  I have never really been able to produce that kind of engagement on my own by sending positive vibes.

If we want to make a difference for ourselves and our children in the area of free speech, we have to take a bigger look at Section 230 and why it needs to go away.  While politicians are pointing fingers to protect their voting base, a young man is being radicalized online and planning a violent act against someone or themselves.  This is what we have learned from recent mass shootings and high profile murders.  The shooters political ideologies are not solid, but they were all radicalized against their targets on social media or in the gaming world.  Why would we not eliminate Section 230 and spare ourselves from this?

This also requires effort on our part.  If rage sells, we have to stop participating.  The social media companies make money hand over fist because we allow it.  This is why 230 has no chance of going away.  The ad money they make from us goes to lobbyists to protect the company's interest.  We have a part to play to protect ourselves and the mental health of our children.  What is stopping us?

There's a saying that your rights end where the next man's nose begins.  When it comes to free speech, the next man's nose is very bloody right now and no one should not be okay with it.  Take a look at your own behavior, the content your kids are consuming, and be vocal about the things that matter most.  Not the protection of your feelings, but the hate we let in as we mindlessly scroll social media.  We have to take control over this.  Eliminating 230 is only a start, we have to do the rest.

The Catch 22 Known as Social Media

 I, like many, enjoy social media.  In fact, I've always had a bit of a system.  My Facebook account is used for family and friends, Twitter is used for professional connections, and Instagram Reels keep me belly laughing.  It's a simple life that has always worked for me.  I keep my feeds clean of any nonsense and unfriend/unfollow people if I need to.  Until recently I can say that it's been a good experience.

A couple of weeks ago I left Twitter. I joined almost 12 years ago to expand my professional network of school administrators.  My activity did just that.  I connected with admins across the state and participated in professional discussion and outreach.  My tweets got some engagement and my engagement with other school admins served me as professional development.  This changed in the last few years.  My feed became dominated by negativity, obvious manufactured news stories, and an onslaught of disdain for teachers and schools as institutions.  I hear people say they feel their mental health gets damaged by social media and I have now begun to understand what that means.

Between some acquaintances and a couple of podcasters I listen to, Threads has emerged as a good alternative to X.  I connected my account through Instagram and dove right in.  It was immediately nicer than X and I was caught off guard by a simple white screen and no ads.  I few posts in, I posted the following:

The next day, the teacher apathy began flowing through my feed despite the tone of this post.  Constant doubting of the profession, calling out teachers, and teachers complaining about their schools were all in the mix.  That old feeling crept back in.  I began to scroll fast through what I saw as negative posts and wasn't finding much to be interested in.

I decided to take control of my feed.  I posted a positive celebratory message and thankfully it got a respectable amount of engagement.  Until I saw the first comment.

I tell other people to be the good they want to see and that the grass is greener where they water it and yada yada.  That is not going to work on this particular individual.

If we have yet to figure this out, social media is a catch-22.  We can blame the algorithms for what is fed to us and that would be fair.  But those algorithms have to have the content to feed us and that falls back on us.  If we only post our grievances, it will be used against us, and complaining is something we are really good at.

As I learn to use this platform and its filtering, I will still keep posting the positives.  I feel truly blessed to work in education and I know not everyone feels that way.  The least we can do is reach out to those struggling and help them serve their kids while helping themselves.  Social media is a catch-22 and cannot be our therapy.

More Than a Crown

 Warning: Dad Brag Post

About a year ago I was sitting in the Benton Civic Center watching something that I thought I would never be a part of.  My daughter, Makane, entered the Princess Flame Scholarship Pageant as part of the Old King Coal Festival.  Being her first pageant I think we had no expectations for her to win, but we did want her to try her best as we always do.  When they called her name as the 2023 Miss Princess Flame at the end of the evening, I went from "Who cares about pageants anyway?" to "Holy crap my kid just won!" in a split second.

After a year of being Princess Flame, she retired her crown last night.  I have to say (and not because I'm her dad), she wore that crown well.  During the course of that year, she did all the things that pageant winners do.  She rode in parades, did the speaking engagements, and visited special events like the Veterans Honor Flight all in service to Old King Coal and the community of West Frankfort.  Something else was also happening.

She also used the title to serve.  (This is where the dad brag comes in.)  She started the Building Leaders Project with two very worthy activities.  She collected over 250 books through donations to give to the Saint Louis Children's Hospital.  She also coordinated an art supply drive for the Night's Shield Children's Shelter in West Frankfort.  To say that we are proud of her for using her crown in service to others is an understatement.  Over the years, she has made us very proud in a variety of ways. Now as she has become a young woman this is the kind of pride in her that I'm looking for.  

Parents, I hope we are looking for the same thing out of our children.  When given a big opportunity, what will our kids do with it?  Will they check it off the list and merely say, "Look what I did that one time."?  Or will they see the chance to do something that leaves an impact?  As our kids get older, it is important to encourage them to serve but to also set the standard for service.  I snapped this picture last night to hopefully remind her that with her effort, the next Princess Flame will want to meet the standard set forth or even better, exceed it.  I'm confident that Makane set a high bar and for that, I could not be prouder.

Makane, thank you for representing your crown and Old King Coal the way you have.  You have set the standard for the next young lady and the next and so on.  Congratulations on your reign and though I am not ready to call myself a pageant dad, I am always proud to be called your dad.  Your mother and I are very blessed.  You are more than any crown you might wear. 

Local Tax Referendums Matter

Election day is upon us again and we often lament on the candidates we get to choose from, but we also get to answer Yes or No to local tax referendums.  I know, we are taxed to death and nobody likes those taxes raised.  Don't just answer No because of the price tag.  These are important issues.  Oddly, the two most important referendums to me will not be on the ballot where I live this election.

The first, and most important to me, is the building referendum for Bethel Grade School where I am the proud Superintendent/Principal.  It will be difficult to hide my bias here, but we have to replace a 108-year-old wing of our building.  It can no longer be maintained and it is cost-prohibitive to fix.  Our current plan is to replace that wing and put it in a different spot on the property to ensure it does not suffer the same fate as the old wing.  We will also be renovating our gym and adding a new lobby, bathrooms, and concession stand.  This will be a big deal for our little school.  In all the conversations I've had, our community wants this, but there will still be those who will focus on the price tag and miss the big picture.  

The second is the West Frankfort Park.  Officials are asking to raise their debt limit to help keep the park running including the Aquatic Center which has become a nice attraction to the park over the years.  More than 100 people use the Aquatic Center each day for a variety of activities.  Look beyond that and you will find a beautiful area that offers so much to the community.  The playgrounds are exceptional, the grounds are well-kept, and you can catch a ballgame almost year-round.  I've read that there has not been a tax increase for this purpose since 1996.  Still, there is a contingent that sees only the price tag.

Here is my plea,  I know it costs money and not all of us can afford it.  However, if we want nice things for our kids, their kids, and so on, we have to pay for them.  When our state or federal income taxes go up, we often have no idea where that money is going.  I think we can all agree that those dollars do not always go where we would like them to.  When a local taxing body asks for an increase for something that we see and use every day, we should be excited.  We can see that progress and can be proud of what our communities can do for their members.  Don't be afraid to vote for a tax increase that you can see working for you directly.

I've done a lot of research in my own effort to pass the Bethel Referendum.  When I looked back on referendum questions in Jefferson County I found that even though statewide tax questions were overwhelmingly voted down, local more community-based tax questions were passing almost 2 to 1.  That tells me that people get it.  It is easier to vote yes, the more local it is.  These local tax referendums matter and please do not feel that a Yes vote is a difficult choice.  Vote for your local needs on Tuesday.

Famous Enough for Now

 

A really cool thing happened after my son's basketball game last night.  As he was walking up to us as we waited to leave, a little guy with a small basketball approached him and asked him for his autograph.  I'm sure this took him by surprise and he did give a big grin afterwards.  As we followed this little guy around he was finding as many of our players as he could to get their autographs on his ball.  While this was an episode of cuteness for our group, it confirmed to me what I have been telling student-athletes for a long time.  

As a school leader, I try really hard to help student-athletes understand why they need to behave and always be the best versions of themselves.  No matter what, somebody wants to be what they are.  To a 13 or 15-year-old kid, this doesn't make sense.  They don't feel famous enough to be asked for an autograph, but to a 6 or 7-year-old kid, they are everything they want to be.  This kid can't wait to be old enough to wear that uniform and take their shots on the floor of the great Max Morris Gym.  For this reason, it is important for our student-athletes to be great role models.  They help grow the next group of kids that can't wait to be them.

It happens that middle and high school kids have to be disciplined or removed from teams.  They lose playing time because they break team rules.  Sure these rules exist for management of the team and to ensure fairness, but I say it is more than that.  It makes sure the kids have guardrails to help them be the best version of themselves.  Our little guys need to see this.  They might watch the pros on TV, but our student-athletes are what they get to see in person and have access to.  They may dream of being in the NBA, but today they want to be a high school basketball player just like our sons and daughters.  We have to help our kids see that they are vital to this mission and even just their presence means the world to some little kid.

Adults, we are not off the hook.  The next time we catch ourselves complaining about our work or burdens, there are some people who wish they had our burdens instead of theirs.  We have to be good role models too and understand our blessings.

Who knows, maybe someday my son will be asked for his autograph because he's rich and famous.  Today, some little kid asked because he gets to wear our school colors and play on the floor he hopes to play on.  He and his teammates are important to this kid and that is famous enough for now.

X - Twitter User?

Calm down.  I don't plan to bash Elon Musk.  I'm not overly impressed with him and I think he just might be another rich person who doesn't know how to stay in their lane.  It's funny when you hear a pro athlete get vocal about a social issue, they are told to shut up and play ball.  Now the shoe is on a different foot.  Mr. Musk needs to be quiet and fix Twitter.

When he bought the platform, I was instantly worried.  In the end, I figured that he was a successful businessman and he should be able to make it work.  The opposite has happened.  Since his involvement, Twitter has lost users, advertisers, and money.  He recently blasted advertisers for what he called holding the platform hostage for ad money.  Not to mention he fired us all up with rebranding it to X, a move I still cannot settle with.

To be fair, I am no social media expert and I have no idea how to right the ship.  I am the "Joe Six Pack" of this universe and my personal experience is what really counts to me.  I joined Twitter in 2012 at the urging of my then-superintendent, Greg Goins.  I wasn't really excited about this.  I was a Facebook guy and that was plenty to keep up with.  I could see myself creating an account and never scrolling through it.  However, Dr. Goins was on to something.  This space was a great place to network with other school administrators.  I enjoyed it and really took my account seriously.

I'm no influencer, but I had a decent engagement to Tweets and I could count on some kind of response to anything I tweeted.  Again, I was staying in my school admin lane but I did branch out and gained more followers and started following more influential people.  I really liked this momentum and I began creating blog content and Tweeting it.  I was on cruise control for several years.

When Elon Musk took over I began to call it the era of the blue check.  Almost immediately this little icon no longer symbolized a verified identity.  It signified a subscription.  This is when my Twitter activity began to slow down.  I don't pay for my little blue check mark, but my Twitter behavior has not changed.  I Tweet the same types of things, hashtag, and tag people just like always.  Overnight I saw my small amount of engagement shrink to nearly nothing.  The growth of my professional network began to slow also.  

In an effort to enjoy Twitter again, I began following sports card collectors to help nurture a hobby of mine.  Still yet, the connections do not feel organic, they feel driven by the check marks of many colors.  In fact, I am now being solicited more than ever to pay to play.  This was waiting on my feed for me just yesterday.  I can pay for reply prioritization.  Seems like the content should drive the platform and not paid prioritization, but hey I'm just a Joe Six Pack.

I don't know yet if I will soon be an ex-Twitter user.  I do know that I will use it a lot less and it is already a low priority for me when I post something.  Maybe Musk will sell off the company and it can see the good ole days again.  That might be the only way he can fix Twitter, X, or whatever the young kids call it these days.  I dare not hope for too much.